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And so to round two….

Posted by DINRIL on May 11, 2011

…..OK, so all things considered we didn’t do that badly on the first round of semi-final predictions, actually getting seven correct out of ten. Granted, we were off the mark on Albania, Norway and Turkey – but really, who wasn’t? Is there really anybody out there who seriously thought Turkey wouldn’t make the final? (if you are there, show yourselves!). Or who actually thought Lithuania would nab themselves a place in the top ten? Exactly. So while we didn’t get a full house, we didn’t exactly disgrace ourselves either.

And on that note, it’s time to offer up our predictions for who’ll make it out of Thursday’s semi-final….

DENMARK

Why? As dependable as a brace of bargain kitchen equipment from Tiger, this is one that the casual viewers will lap up. Unfortunately we can’t think of anything else to say about it. But barring a shock of Turkey-esque proportions, we’ll be seeing this one in the final.

BOSNIA AND HERZEGOVINA

Why? B&H have never lucked out in a semi-final yet, and with the venerable Dino Merlin on board they’re not going to start now. But then given that this is one of our favourite songs this year we’d frankly be horrified if it didn’t make it.

UKRAINE

Why? OK, so the failure of Turkey and Armenia means it’s no longer a given that certain countries always make the cut. But since this is actually a fairly decent, well-performed ballad and has the added novelty of renowned Ukrainian sand artist Kseniya Simonova performing alongside Mika Newton, we don’t somehow think they’re going to suffer the same fate. (Meanwhile rumours that Blue are employing the services of that bloke on Britain’s Got Talent who made pictures out of toast and Marmite have been entirely unfounded….)

SWEDEN

Why? Well basically one of two things will happen here. Either Eric Saade’s performance will go off without a hitch and everybody will remember why it is that they loved this song in the first place (even though it is little more than a nursery rhyme with a slightly catchy beat) and will vote it through to the final. Or the glass on the box will fail to break, incarcerating Eric to the extent that he will have to stand in the box looking a bit lost and puzzled for the remainder of the song, upon which time everybody will be so amused/feel so sorry for him that they’ll vote to keep him in anyway. Either way he is in a win-win situation. Next!

IRELAND

Why? Well according to the latest word from the bookies Jedward are now in fact second favourites to win the entire contest (only France stand in their way, and frankly if they end up beating Amaury then we will probably finish laughing some time around next year’s first semi-final). The fact it’s a VERY CATCHY song and this may well be THE PERFORMANCE OF THE NIGHT will help of course, but we can’t help thinking it would be a major shocker if the boys didn’t make it through. And frankly Saturday’s final would be a boring place without them.

ESTONIA

Why? We find ourselves in a similar situation to Hungary’s entry here, in that the song is very well liked but apparently doesn’t look quite so good when put on a stage. Nevertheless the Hungarians have made it to the final and in spite of all reservations we expect Getter will probably do the same. But whether that weird dream we had last week in which Estonia and the UK were battling it out on the scoreboard for first place actually transpires is another matter entirely.

ROMANIA

Why? We’ve had our eye on this song for a while, ever since it was chosen in that five-hour epic on New Year’s Eve (you remember, the one we stayed in and watched while everybody else was out having lives). Mark our words, the viewing public will be charmed by its inherent jauntiness. And of course since Dave is indeed British we wouldn’t dream of leaving him out of the line-up.

AUSTRIA

Why? Because they’ll sulk and flounce again if they don’t go through? Possibly, but the fact this is one of the strongest ballads in the contest and Nadine has a sensational voice will probably help also. And we reckon jury love will see it comfortably through.

SLOVENIA

Why? Speaking of ballads, this is another tremendously powerful effort which has reportedly been note perfect in rehearsals. There is of course the possibility that Maja and Nadine may cancel each other out – but to be honest we’re so utterly thrilled at the prospect of the Slovenes actually doing well for a change (given that they’re one of the few countries who have proven even more hopeless than the UK in recent years) that we’re putting them in the qualification zone regardless.

AND FINALLY….MOLDOVA

Why? Well we thought long and hard about this one but then decided that if there is one thing this year’s contest needs, it is unicyling fairies surrounded by men wearing giant pointy hats.  And bearing in mind this will take to the stage after a string of nonsense (Slovakia, Belgium et al), it can’t possibly fail to stand out from the crowd.

OR IT COULD BE…

Israel – we so very very nearly put Israel into the top ten and we still think they could easily make it but very negative word of mouth on Dana International’s performance – plus the failure rate of previous champions returning to the fray in recent years – leaves us thinking that this one could just miss out. Or possibly Dana’s reputation as Eurovision royalty could win her a place in the final anyway. It’s all too confusing.

Latvia – could be one of the surprise packages of the night a la Switzerland on Tuesday. Or could flop hopelessly. We just can’t tell…

Cyprus – a lot of people seem to fancy this one’s chances but there may well be too many dramatic ballads in the mix for it to get a look in. And where are Greece with the douze points when you need them?

Belarus – not really, this is just wishful thinking on our part –  but who wouldn’t want to see this in the final…..?

And that, as they say, is that. Tune in again on Friday when we shall be predicting that the UK, France, Spain, Germany and Italy will all win places in the final (er, hang on a minute…..)

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One Response to “And so to round two….”

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